Monday, February 20, 2012

Non-Descript Robberies in Carroll County

Political correctness run a muck? Last night a man was accosted in the parking lot at the Eldersburg plaza. The victim suspects he came upon the person trying to break into his car. Fifteen minutes later, there was a robbery at the Quicky Mart on Village Road in Sykesville.

WBAL.com describes the person as having a medium build with black jeans, a black hooded sweatshirt and a baseball cap. Well, that eliminates women. And little guys. And big guys. Therefore, the robber was one of 2 million other Marylanders. We have no idea if this guy was white, black, Asian, Middle Eastern, Italian, Latino, or from Delaware. We don't know if he had red hair, white hair, brown hair, blond hair, yellow hair, black hair, green hair, or blue hair.

I suppose the police and WBAL are trying to avoid racial profiling. This is very fortunate for the robbery suspect. He has a great chance of getting away now. I plan on going to Wal-Mart today and then calling the police and telling them that there are 15 people matching the description in the auto parts department.

Please help us here in Eldersburg. If you see a man with a medium build wearing black clothes please call the police. Perhaps if they get 10,000 calls that require them to investigate, they'll put out a more appropriate description of the suspect. I'm sorry, the person of interest.

Stupid political correctness. Yay crime!!!

UPDATE

The Eldersburg Patch is reporting that the suspect is a white male. Shame on Jim Russ and WBAL for being so ambiguous.

3 comments:

Kent Allard said...

They caught the turd:
http://eldersburg.patch.com/articles/state-police-charge-incarcerated-pennsylvania-man-in-eldersburg-westminster-armed-robberies

From druggieville...um I mean Littlestown PA.

Eludius said...

This is excellent news. Thank you Kent for posting this.

Kent Allard said...

There's been quite a bit of crime over the past few months in the Carrolltown/Hilltop/Brimfield neighborhoods, basically all of MacBeth Way. All committed by heroin users. Car breaks in, burglary, general trespassing/prowling through yards. One of the perps lives with his parents right off of MacBeth. He seems to be racking up charges left and right and just keeps getting right back out to do more.

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