Sunday, May 27, 2007

Woman of the Year

So, I'm not talking about Hillary Clinton, Suzie Orman, or Sheila Dixon. I am talking about Elizabeth Hasselbeck. The cute talk-show co-host has done what very few have accomplished over thousands of years of entertainment - she pissed off Rosie O'Donnell so much that she decided to end her contract with The View earlier than expected.

The obese Rosie O'Donnell, the cancer of decency, has been shoveling her brand of elitist homo-agenda rhetoric down the throats of stay-at-home mom's and unfortunate early afternoon gym members for several years. Several attempts to stifle her by forcing Goodyear tires into her mouth were averted when she jumped on some ropes and hung upside down. She claims she performed this buffoon activity so that she wouldn't be sad about thinking that Tom Selleck owns a gun.

Rosie O'Donnell and the cute Hasselbeck started arguing after communist and fascist sympathizer Joy Behar got diarrhea of the mouth and accused Republicans for all that is wrong in the world. She supported her rhetoric with unsubstantiated propaganda and rhetoric. Hasselbeck, the conservative on the show and outnumbered 300-1 (when considering the weight of the Twinkies and ho-hos stored in the asses of the show's others hosts), began defending the war and President Bush.

O'Donnell later inferred that the U.S. troops were the terrorists. O'Donnell, who has never denied that she donates money to Al-Quaida, started ripping into "little innocent Christian Elizabeth". The remaining dialog is about as important as David Hasselhoff's drunken video - everyone is interested, but it doesn't make much of a difference in life. However, Hasselbeck's heated defense resulted in the greatest victory since the Normandy Invasion. Rosie has removed her Birkenstocks and over-sized stirrup pants and will run and hide into seclusion with her wife.

This is why Elizebeth Hasselbeck has earned my vote for Woman of the Year!!!!

1 comment:

MrsTwink said...

I thought you'd be interested in this: http://www.fireelisabethhasselbeck.com/

I think its time you penned a new blog since this one didn't really keep O'Malley out of office.

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